Stuck Moving Forward

A few weeks ago I stayed up until 1:00 am freaking out about not being prepared to uproot my life and move. I made plans to go back to school for Marine Biology and I have been working hard for the last year and a half to make that happen. My high school career was somewhat tumultuous to say the least and I never took my SAT's. So I was told by the school that I want to attend that I would need to take one year of college English and Math in order to transfer. So I did just that. After completing those requirements I sent in my application to Oregon and waited.... and waited.

My brain was over loaded with fears about not having any where to live and I would still need to continue working while I'm in school and I don't have a job lined up. I don't even know how one picks up and starts over some where else. I don't have any friends that live up there, nor family that I could stay with until I get on my feet. Everything was just slipping through my fingers and I was scared!

Well the decision came and with it I have feelings of sadness and relief. My application was denied. I spent one night crying, just one. The next day I picked up the phone to find out why. My GPA was 0.2 points too low and I needed 2 full years of high school french and I only had 1.5. I was even more upset when I found out that my GPA at my current school, Red Rocks, is a 3.0, but they requested my transcripts from ACC. Those dropped my GPA to 2.3. Hell!!! But my relief came when I realized that this setback gives me more time. More time to prepare to uproot my life.

So even with the sad news, that I will not be moving as planned this summer to Oregon, I'm happy. In the face of this minor misstep I'm still moving forward and I'm sticking to a decision that I made over two years ago now. I feel like I'm finally living up to the promises I made to myself. I am happy about where I am and where I'm going. In other words, being stuck moving forward never felt so good!